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Hello and welcome to Art A&A number 14. This is the stop shoulding on yourself episode.

Marketing as Therapy

The more I talk to clients, the more I realize there’s a certain level of therapy happening in marketing. In marketing we’ve all heard about the psychology of the brain and why people buy, what people buy, other triggers to buying… Depending on your psychology people have different buying habits. The therapy that I’m discovering is little bit different. The more I talk to clients and the more that I drill down with my clients into their best work and their most joyful work, I’m coming up against resistance and it seems to revolve around peoples idea of what they should be doing.

Go Ahead, Kill Your Joy

The “shoulds”…and I’m telling ya, your shoulds are going to kill your love and joy.

It’s very common – people have a lot of misconceptions about what they should be doing. I hear alot of:

  • who’s going to pay me to paint?
  • why should I have joyous work while others struggle?
  • who do I think I am who am I to make a life that I love?

Well I’m saying to you… who are you not to?

It’s NOT Selfish

You are not being selfish by choosing to pursue a livelihood that will bring you joy and happiness …and cash. Fulfilling yourself in work that satisfies and elates you is not selfish. The shoulds that are preventing you from having a full life are inherited from others.

It’s Not Yours – You Just Learned It

Shoulds are the expectations, beliefs and limitations from our parents teachers and other authority figures through our life. We learned what work is and what work is about by how our parents approach work. If they weren’t happy in their jobs, we’re unlikely to easily embrace pursuing joy in our own careers. We’re more likely to think that work is a chore, a necessary evil, drudgery, or a trap. This isn’t the truth it’s just inherited expectations.

You Have the Right to Live the Most Joyous Life That You Can Create

This is so important that I’m going to repeat it:

You have the right to live the most joyous life that you can create.

You Are a Gift

We’re not here to suffer. As an artist you’re certainly not here to starve in melancholy and die alone. Understand and embrace that the artist is a gift to humanity. The creatives in all disciplines fuel the evolution of our species. I’ll be talking more about this later on the blog and in a podcast, but your art is a gift. You were made to share with the world your unique artistic perspective you have been given a gift to uplift others your gift is there to spread joy, beauty and connection, understanding and information. You help no one by staying small and hiding your gifts in the basement. Nothing is gained by you thinking small and minimizing what is possible through a bunch of shoulds that don’t serve you.

F***k Others

Don’t worry about people who are uncomfortable with your talent, your gifts, your success now or your success in the future. Don’t worry about friends and family who are unsure and uncomfortable with the idea of you growing or taking your creative path seriously and building a viable business plan around your creative work.

Often resistance from family members and loved ones is more about themselves than it is about you. It’s about the things they left undone in their own life for themselves, and it’s easier to feel good about themselves if you don’t change, if you stay the same. If you stay the same they don’t have to grow. If you don’t grow, they don’t have to look at their lives and change – so don’t worry about what anyone else is saying.

Stop Shoulding on Yourself – Plan With JOY Instead

Don’t should on yourself anymore.

Stop staying small by dreaming small and making small plans that involve all the crap that you think you should be doing.

Plan your business with joy and fulfillment as your guide.

Include the things that energize you, that make you feel like a better person.

Ccreate your business plan around those activities and people that make you happy to be alive – that make you believe in yourself and in one another and in the world.

That’s a plan that has a hope of hell in succeeding. All the shoulds in the world are never gonna touch it.

If you’d like to think more and get conscious about your business plan and planning direction they’re some free marketing resources available.

The Marketing Lab Foundations Minicourse – it’s a seven part course that will be e-mailed to you that goes through all the basic foundation questions required for you to get your business plan off the ground and start thinking about it in a conscious fairly objective way – no shoulds allowed!

Sign up here to get the minicourse delivered to your inbox:



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