NeoKnowThyself…and then love what we know.

If we can do THAT, then I think we’ve pretty much got it covered.

…but it’s HARD to know ourselves.

We are these cosmic mysteries to ourselves… and the “wanting” & “shoulding” that we put on and wear that distracts us from “the really real”…. GUH – it’s exhausting.

…but so good to clear out and connect with who we really are. What we really love and find enjoyable…

I dream of a world where we all just live our truth and love ourselves as we are.


You are amazing –
just the way you are.

Here’s the video for people who like video:


Sometimes, parents just know

When I was in my mid 20’s my mom hit me with this stinger:
“I don’t think you should have children. You’re not suited to them…
you’re too selfish.”


I was angry and hurt and I hated her for saying that…

Secretly, I didn’t forgive her until about 4 years ago when Keith brought kids into my life in a very real and regular way.



…because I’m too selfish.

My mom NAILED it.

Nailed it WAY before I could see it in myself.

She said she knew early on that I shouldn’t have kids… and it’s not a slight or an insult. She saw me for who I really am and what would be suitable for me in this life – and kids aren’t it.
“You’re too ambitious and too into your business and alone time and your own interests…

You can’t have the life you want to have AND have kids. You don’t want to give up you – and you have to if you’re going to raise kids well.”
She was right.

She saw my truth and my weakness at parenting before I could see it in myself.

This is from 3 or 4 years ago... The big one on the left is in cop college.

This is from 3 or 4 years ago… The big one on the left is in cop college.

My mom was completely and utterly correct about me – and I was happier once I accepted who I really am when it comes to parenting.

It’s not that I don’t like or care about kids – I am lucky enough to get the exact right proportion of kids in my life with Keith: every other weekend… PLUS I’m not the primary caregiver when they’re here so I can fuck off and be by myself when I’ve had enough.

It’s perfect.

Could you imagine how terrible and resentful I would be as a mom? Maybe I could’ve gotten away with being so selfish as a Dad. Let’s face it – in general, Dad’s are a bonus in the whole parenting scenario. Mom’s are the primary caregivers and that’s just how things seem to roll out here.

I would’ve sucked it up and sacrificed my desires and given up my wants for the sake of my child because that’s who I am. That’s what I would have to do.

OldTimeDaddyI would’ve done it – but I would’ve resented the fuck out of it. And my child would grow up feeling that underlying resentment and wonder why they felt like they were always in the way. My child would grow up knowing that they were loved… but not sure if they were ever really liked.

I know this because my father, like me – should never have had kids.

Like me, he was too selfish and too into his own life and wants and desires and liked to be alone …and resented the fact that his children were always in his way.

Embrace “True You”

I know me better now.

I accept me for who I am… instead of clinging to the “coulda, shoulda, woulda” of parenting.

We need to practice this as creative solopreneurs and especially as Soul First business owners.

Know our strengths, accept our weaknesses… and STOP berating ourselves for who we are not.

What a colossal waste of fucking energy.

We need our own version of the AA serenity prayer:

Like a parent, we would do better to own our strengths and accept our weaknesses… and then ask for help.

There’s no point in whipping ourselves for all the ways we could be different – accept what is and then get help for the rest. Ask for help, resource for help, find out the answers, find someone who knows… learn it yourself or throw some money at the problem.

Best yet – know on a soul level what you are and are not willing to do for your creative business.

Embrace the Hobbyist

Irene wrote me a couple weeks ago.

She was very apologetic, but firm and wanted me to know that she appreciates all that I do and enjoyed my art business talk at her art group but she had come to the conclusion that she was going to stay a professional hobbyist.

She loved the art making and the showing of the art and the community of artists… but didn’t like the pressure to sell or the pressure to market or promote.

It ruined the art for her.

It robbed her of the clear joy of painting – where she would paint for herself and no one else and it didn’t matter if it sold or covered the expenses of the show or not.

She was done with the business side of art.

She would still show and if she sold a few paintings here or there – great… but running it as a business was too much for her.
She didn’t want it.

She was sorry, and hoped I wasn’t disappointed – but she was sure. That’s what she wanted.


Hi Irene,

Thanks for the message and wonderful words.

I am thrilled that you embrace your art as a professional hobbyist.

I wish that there were more artists who were willing to commit and let go of all the pressure and angst around selling and marketing. They would be a lot happier I think. Many are committed to “the dream” of a full-time artists life – but aren’t willing to put the effort or the hours in.

It IS hard… and it’s not for everyone.

Good luck with everything Irene. I’ll see you in the fall – have a great summer!

Take good care,

Helping Artists Succeed since 1998.
289 LaSalle Avenue | Oshawa ON. | L1H 5Y7 | CANADA
**Please note new number: 289.928.5412**

Art hugs & love notes for your art biz.

It IS hard… and it’s NOT for everyone.

Embrace the “whatever” that is your flaming pile of joy.

Maybe it’s an art biz, maybe it’s something else… whatever it is – it’s exactly what you WANT to be doing.

I don’t run an art business.

I use art to promote my business – I “illustrate” my soul first business consulting practice using art – but I don’t run an art business.

I still show and sell art – but I’m a professional art hobbyist.

I do NOT WANT to have a full time art career.

I just don’t like making art that much. (It took me a few years to learn – but comics taught me that lesson.)

Know Thyself.

I’m an artist and I use art in my business – but I also write.

I write a LOT.

I make videos.

I speak in public.

F-uckingImpTextureI love doing ALL those things.

And I love business. I love marketing and promoting and teaching. Mostly I love teaching creatives how to “business”. I love teaching creatives how to fucking value themselves and what they do.

I love being a mirror to the incredible need and necessity of your gifts in the world.

I love seeing you stand on your feet and finally realize “Holy shit – no one can do exactly what I do… this is incredible.”

Holy shit is right. You are fucking incredible.

You know what you do. You know how people feel about what you bring to their lives. OWN it. That’s yours. Those are your gifts – that’s your magic.

Believe in it. Don’t forget. Plug it back into your heart and send your love out to the world.

Don’t forget again. (we all forget again – we’re constantly reminding each other to re-member our majesty).

You’re here right now because you needed a reminder.

A reminder of your majesty. Your glory and your light.

infinity-584674_1280You’re reading this right now because you needed to be reminded of what you have to give – the truth of who we are.

You needed to be reminded, “Yes, you’re right – it’s all real.”

Your full loving heart of universal connection? It’s real.

Your being part of the message and the voice of creation? It’s real.

Coastal Town at NightYour weeping at the beauty of it all because sometimes you just can’t stand how much you love it all? It’s real.

Me too. I’m there with you too.

We’re miraculous beings of infinite mystery and sometimes I can’t help but bawl like a child and weep at the beauty and the wonder of it all and then bawl like a child and weep at the horror and the suffering… and then weep again because they both exist together – simultaneously… and both exist… in love.

You’re a part of it. And so is your art or your healing or your writing or singing or acting or inspiration.

You came here to make it so.

You came here to be a mirror to others of the truth you feel in your soul.

You did. It’s real. Go do it.

Work with Me

Maybe it’s time to take the next step and focus your efforts on those actions that will see you making the most strides towards your biz goals.

Let me take a look at where you’re at with your creative online biz and we can work together to lay down a plan forward for the Next 6 Months.
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