I want to talk to you today about a mystical experience that I had when I was in my 20s.
I think it’s important to share with you, since I haven’t ever before, talked about this publicly in any way, ever.
It’s actually critical and formulating in my life for who I am now and the things that I’m doing now.
I went to Queen’s University and I was surrounded by engineers at a time in my life that I was also interested in spirituality and my own relationship to divinity and the world in my life and trying to understand what it all meant and where I fit in it.
The big questions
Up until that point, I had thought I was going to be a lawyer. That was my father’s dream. He wanted me to be a lawyer.
It’s amazing what we do because the people that we love in our lives give us positive feedback about that stuff.
My dad was really happy and excited for me to be a lawyer. That made him happy and that’s why I pursued it for as long as I did.
When I went to Queen’s, I realized I wasn’t going to do that.
I had a little mental breakdown, not really, but a culture shock of what am I really here for? Because that was really what started this whole thing is I thought about being a lawyer.
The whole reason in my head to be a lawyer was to get a good job, to make a lot of money, to buy a big house and have a nice car.
See, it started to breakdown there. It started to not really make sense anymore.
Where was the happiness? Where was the fulfillment? Where was the joy?
I didn’t get it.
Why was I doing this? For what purpose? Why? Why was I here?
Those are the questions that will start changing your life.
Why am I here? What am I supposed to be doing?Anyway, I was surrounded by engineers. It’s interesting because, as I was reading things like The Tao and coming back to the Judeo-Christian Bible and stuff, and reading and trying to understand what my ideas of God were and how I fit and what that relationship looked like and why I was here and my purpose.
My boyfriend was an engineer. I hang around him and all his friends all the time. I started learning about quantum mechanics at the same time that I was having this awakening in spirit.
They’re forever melded as one. The quantum mechanics are God to me.
They’re the same thing. It’s quite fascinating.
Anyway, we can talk about that later.
When I was about 23, I was over at a very good friend’s house.
His name is Dave.
I had what I call now the witch’s brew, which is I had one beer and I shared one joint with Dave. I had one very heavily-laden ginseng tea and one fisherman’s friend.
That was the magical cocktail.
It wasn’t really, but it’s interesting to me to think that that was the potion.
But something happened.
I had what is, in traditions, called a mystical experience, which is the flowing of energy through your body and it clears away all blocks and the way through.
It’s raising the kundalini, as it’s called in the Eastern traditions … I say it all mockingly because I understand how this stuff sounds with the eye roll and the “chakras” and “clearing my energy”.
I can’t say it without mocking it because it’s just so eye roll, but it is what it is.
I believe our bodies are fields of energy.
That’s all we are.
We’re all energy. We’re just vibrating waves that also look like particles.
It feels like it sprouts out of the top of your head and it fountains out. It’s like having a whole body orgasm, basically…
When this was happening, Dave was talking to me about, I don’t know, thought balls or something.
I don’t even remember what he was saying to me because my concentration was on how my body was feeling and how something was happening.
I kept telling him,
“Stop, stop. Something’s happening. I don’t know what it is. Stop, stop. Something’s happening. I don’t know what’s going on.”
What it was was this mystical experience, which changed my life forever.
My energy poured all through my body, out the top of my head. It fountained all around.
I just started to laugh because in this moment was knowing.
This is different from learning or thinking or something like this.
This was knowing, experiential in the cells right down to the vibration of the atoms knowing, that everything was one, nothing is exempt, and there is only love.
Those are the 2 filters that have been guiding forces in my life since that moment in my mid-20s: is it loving and is it inclusive? Because those are the only 2 things that I know for sure are real in the world that exist, that there is nothing that is exempt.
Everything is okay, and it’s all Divine
There is not one single thing that exists outside of divinity.
Everything is divine. Everything is God.
I hate the word God. It’s so totally and completely inadequate to describe the depth and breadth of what it’s supposed to represent – the existence of the universe.
I will, from now on, call it Beloved Presence because that’s what makes me happy.
There is nothing that is outside Beloved Presence. We’re all one. We’re all connected, intimately connected. There is nothing that is exempt. There is nothing outside. Nothing exists outside of that, even the void. The void is within the Beloved Presence.
It’s all love.
I knew, at that same core vibration, atom level of that, everything was okay.
Everything had always been okay. It was okay right now.
It will always be okay. Everything is okay.
Nothing can be destroyed the way we think. Nothing. Nothing is ever going to shit the way we think. We can try our hardest and we will never be able to ruin it the way we think we can.
There’s no judgment.
There is just unbelievable, unconditional love and understanding.
We fail when it comes to unconditional love in comparison to what I felt in that moment.
It was just utter and total acceptance and love.
Period. That’s it. That’s all that exists here.
That changed my life forever.
I don’t think you can go through something like that and not be changed forever.
The nice thing about it was for years afterwards, all I had to do was ask for a hug from Beloved Presence and I would have that same feeling again – total calm and peace, total, unconditional love, and knowing that everything was okay.
It had always been okay and it will always be okay.
Then I stopped asking for it and I stopped thinking about it and I forgot.
Forgotten, but never lost
I just remembered.
I just recently remembered again.
That’s why this is changing.
Everything needs to change in my life to get back on track to what has always been the only that ever mattered to me, which was talking about how divinity exists and how you and I are it.
We are allowing that spirit to come into the world through what we do and what we say and what we think.
All right, that’s my moment, my mystical moment that I thought you should probably know about.
We’re still going to talk about business.
We’re still going to talk about art. We’re still going to talk about creative businesses.
We’re still going to do all of that stuff. It’s just now it is in the framework of a spiritual conversation.
I can’t hide it behind anything else anymore.
I believe this is a spiritual life we live.
Everything we do is with sacred purpose.We can either get on board and understand and work with that or make a bunch of decisions that don’t make any sense because they’re based in stupidness like making money, which isn’t stupid but it doesn’t work if it’s from the foundation of making money.
The whole idea is to do work that matters, to share your sacred light, to share what is your purpose here to do, and then learn how to make that into a sustainable business.
No one taught us in college how to live and work a spiritual practice. Yeah, build a spiritual-based business, build a heart-based light worker business, yet there was not class for that. We’re all just figuring that as we go along.
I would love to hear about any of your mystical experiences.
I understand that my mystical experience is really important to me and yours is to you and no one else’s ever going to mean the same as it does to you, but I’d love to hear about it because it’s nice to know that you’re not the only one.
It’s good to know that other people are having these experiences.
I’d love to hear about yours. Let me know. Contact me on any of the myriad of the social medias, Lezley Davidson, L-E-Z-L-E-Y D-A-V-I-D-S-O-N. I’m everywhere – Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest. That’s enough. I’m on Tumblr, but I don’t do Tumblr really well. Anyway, I’m just babbling here.
All right, I’ll talk to you guys soon. Okay, bye. Oh, still only 15 minutes. Yes!